Bulletin
Edition 16 of 2002/3 16 October 2002
Website: www.rotarnet.com.au/users/9/96933
PRESIDENT: STEPHEN TAYLOR
Steve’s Snippets
President Steve has been in W.A. this week and as a result I provide the following "snippets" on his behalf.
Firstly congratulations & welcome to all Pride of Workmanship recipients and also welcome to family and friends of recipients to our special evening in which we recognize individuals who have been identified as having pride in what they do.
Last Friday our club provided a BBQ in Parramatta Park on behalf of Anglicare who held a function for refugees. I attended together with Harley Tarrant, Shirley Del Prado, Niall King, Kevin Beltrame and two staff from the office of Rotary International. Several hundred sausages together with lots of onions were cooked. Thankyou to those Rotarians that took time to make the BBQ happen. Anglicare and all the refugees were truly appreciative. Also a big thankyou to Niall King who had a tow bar fitted to his new, one day old, car just so he could tow the BBQ trailer for Shirley.
A reminder that club elections will be held on 4 December 2002 to elect the Board for the 2003/2004 year. I would encourage all club members to consider nominations for positions on the Board and other positions of office. Remember it’s your club, you get out of it what you put into it.
Last night a group of club members and friends attended Mamma Mia at the Lyric Theatre, Star City and had a most enjoyable evening. President Steve and Denise jetted in from Perth literally minutes before the start of the show.
Finally, thankyou to Keith Byrn, together with his assistants Sue Byrn, Brian Johnson and Grahame True for the planning and organisation of this evening’s function.
President Elect
Tonight’s Guest Speaker
Leader of the Opposition in the Legislative Council
Introduction Euan Watson
Thanks David Croft
Happy Birthday Leedy Watson (16th) Pauline Khu (18th) Happy Anniversary Mira & Bill Carney (21st)
Belated Birthday Wishes to Peter Cipolla (15th).
Peter Douglas, Treasurer
reports:Attendance for Wed 9 October
Present 42 Rotarians
Apologies 12 Leave of Absence 6
Non Apologies 0
Income - Raffle $220.00 Sergeant/Arms $90.00
Last Week’s Recorded On-Time Apologies
:T Ingall, G Singh, A Teale, R Wilson, K Byrn, A Jeganathan, R McDougall, Bala, B Houston, R Vince, R McCluskie
:Raffle Winners
1st (Black Label Scotch) Bill Carney
2nd (Red Wine) Dominic Alvaro
3rd (Dinner next week) John Taylor
Last Week's Speakers
The Bulletin Reports:
Bob Templeman – Job Talk
Growing up on a wheat farm, Bob moved to Yass and sat for the Leaving Certificate before joining the Commonwealth Bank at Dee Why. He spent some interesting years on migrant ships, doing the banking, before going to Canberra for three years, where he finished his accounting credentials. Bob then worked with Speedo Knitting Mills for 10 years before investing in his own business, a newsagency first in West Lindfield, then in Strathfield. Bob also operated a hospital television hire business for some time. He is now retired. Bob joined Rotary in 1979, and was inducted on the same night as Harley Tarrant. In 1983-4 he was President of the Strathfield Club. Bob and his wife, Jan, have three children and 12 grandchildren.
Alan Sweet – Assistant District Governor
Alan told us that one of his jobs as Assistant District Governor is to act as a go-between for the DG with the clubs. The District Training Program is always looking for leaders. He advised that the Brisbane Conference is already 86% booked (US$367 if you finalise before 31 December, US$478 on site). You will find registration forms in Rotary Down Under, but hurry!
David Lewis – Lighting Up Athens
Born in the UK, David moved first to Africa, then to Cape Cabarita. As Lighting Director for the Sydney Olympics in 2000, David had a great deal of responsibility. He told us that 60% of the budget for the Games comes from broadcast fees, going to an audience of 25 million. Each sport has different lighting requirements, and, out of 30 sports, only three don’t need lighting. In Athens, he will be lighting 40 different venues, and 80,000 volunteers will be needed to help the Athens Games run smoothly. Good luck David!
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Congratulations!
To Margaret and David Croft. Firstly Quiet Achiever David has received the Engineering Excellence Award 2002! And as if that wasn’t enough, Margaret and David have just become the very proud grandparents of their daughter’s brand new baby girl, "Bronte". What a wonderful week for the Crofts! Well done! And welcome to the World, Bronte!
[Could this be the beginnings of an all-new ‘Bronte Industries’, we wonder…]
Three Engineers
Three first-year engineering students were sitting around one day arguing about who might've designed the human body. The first one said, "It must've been a mechanical engineer. The human body has all those levers and pivots and stuff - a mechanical engineer must have designed all that."
The second one said, "No, it had to have been an electrical engineer. The complex way the nerves are wired up to the brain must have been designed by an electrical engineer."
Then the third one said, "No, it was a civil engineer. Who else would have run a waste water line through a recreational area?"
TWO YEAR DEGREE
A new two-year degree is being offered at the University that many of you should be interested in: Becoming a Real Man. That’s right, in just six mini-semesters, you, too, can be a real man as well as earn a MA > degree
(Male Arts). Please take a moment to look over the program outline.
FIRST YEAR
Autumn Schedule:
MEN 101:Combating Stupidity
MEN 102:You, Too, Can Do Housework
MEN 103:PMS-Learn When to Keep Your Mouth Shut
MEN 104:We Do Not Want Sleazy Under things for Christmas
Winter Schedule:
MEN 110:Wonderful Laundry Techniques
MEN 111:Understanding the Female Response to Getting in at > 4am
MEN 112:Parenting: It Doesn’t End with Conception
EAT 100:Get a Life, Learn to Cook
EAT 101:Get a Life, Learn to Cook II
ECON 001A:What’s Hers is Hers
Spring Schedule:
MEN 120:How NOT to Act Like a Butt face When You’re Wrong
MEN 121:Understanding Your Incompetence
MEN 122:YOU, the Weaker Sex
MEN 123:Reasons to Give Flowers
ECON 001C:What Was Yours is Hers
SECOND YEAR
Autumn Schedule:
SEX 101:You CAN Fall Asleep without It
SEX 102:Morning Dilemma: If It’s Awake, Take a Shower
SEX 103:How to Stay Awake After Sex
MEN 201How to Put the Toilet Seat Down
(Elective)
(See Electives Below)
Winter Schedule:
MEN 210:The Remote Control: Overcoming Your Dependency
MEN 211:How to Not Act Younger than Your Children
MEN 212:You, Too, Can Be a Designated Driver
MEN 213:Honest, You Don’t Look Like Tom Cruise
MEN 230A:Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important
Spring Schedule:
MEN 220:Omitting %&*! from Your Vocabulary (Pass/Fail Only)
MEN 221:Fluffing the Blanket After Farting Is Not Necessary
MEN 222:Real Men Ask for Directions
MEN 223:Thirty Minutes of Begging is NOT Considered Foreplay
MEN 230B:Her Birthdays and Anniversaries Are Important 2
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Quotable Quotes
"Instead of getting married again, I'm going to find a woman I don't like and just give her a house." -Rod Stewart
"On the one hand, we'll never experience childbirth. On the other
hand, we can open all our own jars." -Bruce Willis
"And God said: 'Let there be Satan, so people don't blame everything on me. And let there be lawyers, so people don't blame everything on Satan." -George Burns
Don’t Advertise It!
NEW - Different color from previous design.
ALL NEW - Parts are not interchangeable with previous design.
EXCLUSIVE - Imported product.
UNMATCHED - Almost as good as the competition.
FOOLPROOF OPERATION - No provision for adjustments.
ADVANCED DESIGN - The advertising agency doesn't understand it.
IT'S HERE AT LAST - Rush job. Nobody knew it was coming.
FIELD TESTED - Manufacturer lacks test equipment.
HIGH ACCURACY - Unit on which all parts fit.
FUTURISTIC - No other reason why it looks the way it does.
REDESIGNED - Previous flaws fixed - we hope.
DIRECT SALES ONLY - Factory had a big argument with distributor.
YEARS OF DEVELOPMENT - We finally got one to work.
BREAKTHROUGH - We finally figured out a use for it.
MAINTENANCE FREE - Impossible to fix.
MEETS ALL STANDARDS - Ours, not yours.
HIGH RELIABILITY - We made it work long enough to ship it.
Next Week’s Speaker
Mary Lewis
Accident Investigation Unit
To Be Introduced by Vicki Wybrow
To Be Thanked by Ray Wilson
Editorial material
vw00000@msn.com up till Sunday lunchtime for that week’s issue. Editor’s privileges apply.Copy for the Bulletin can be forwarded to Vicki Wybrow at
